Monday, February 24, 2014

Empowering those who've been bullied

Hello everyone.  How are you all doing this morning?  I apologize for being gone for so long, but I had some personal business to take care of.  During this time I read some incredible books.  Recently I finished reading The Muse by Susie Carr, who I featured a few weeks ago.  This book really touched my heart because the author writes about a character who was bullied as a child.  As I read I felt many feelings moving in and out of me.  Like the main character in that book I, too, was bullied as a child.

Just before I started my eighth grade year my parents decided to send me to the public school.  I was all excited because now I would be able to go to school with one girl who lived in the neighborhood.  However things changed when school began.   That girl ditched me and started telling kids about the incident I had when I was a young girl.  The kids, of course, taunted me about it.  I never felt so small and alone.

Since the school was so far away, we had to take the bus.  Unfortunately our bus stop was the last stop on the route. I, of course, was the last person on the bus.  The bus was over packed and there was nowhere for me to sit. Unfortunately I had to sit on the floor of the bus, many mornings on the way to school.  The bus driver did nothing.  On the way to school I got called names and had tape and gum  thrown into my hair.  Like Susie's character I too was scared and afraid to speak up for myself.  

I ended up becoming afraid of everything.  For the longest time I slept with my lights and radio on.  Also, I had dreams about these bullies and how I really wanted to successfully fight back at them.    

I had to learn the hard way how to stand up to these people later on in life.  I discovered that giving them their own medicine is not a really good way to negotiate with these people.  Instead I have learned just to be positive and in the now.  Instead of throwing insults back I shine them with kindness.  

This still does not erase the deep scars that I've carried for most of my life.  To me it felt like I always had to be on guard wherever I went.  I did what I could to avoid any drama.  I did not want to draw attention to myself that would end up biting me in the ass.  That's why I isolated myself for so long.  I found out that this is no way to live.

In the end I learned how to empower myself.  I learned that I need to go deep inside for answers as opposed to solely relying on outside sources.  It was the light inside me that gave me the courage to change myself so that I would not attract bullies in the first place.  Since then I have learned self-love.

I am really glad that people like Suzie are speaking out about bullying. I remember during my time in school, the schools didn't want to have anything to do with it because it was not a real problem in their eyes.  Bullying is not teasing.  Bullying is a serious issue. 

I thoroughly enjoyed Susie's book, "The Muse."  I felt that it had a powerful message and spoke to me.  Finally someone else understood the pain that I endured all those years ago.  What inspired me from the story is that people are now standing up to this nonsense.  Hopefully, bullying will be a thing of the past.

I am encouraging all of you to get your copy and read the book today.  This is a must read!

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